Unplugging your child from the system.. to plug them back in the system later

I am currently working on a paper about deconstructing and rebuilding our views on education. Parents remove their children from governmental school systems for various reasons. Those of us who take our children out to AVOID the indoctrination of our children into this world system have to ask ourselves what do we view as the ideal end goal. Are we removing our children from an atheistic/Anti-Biblical/egocentric, colonial/European-washed/racist, amoral, and capitalistic education system only with the goal of making them better than their peers, and able to compete when they re-enter the system? Some parents can’t disentangle themselves from the education system enough to see that if the ONLY goal of taking your child out of the education system is to put them back in for college and/or “the work force”, then you really haven’t taken them out.

College is a great invention. But, it has been distorted. Undergraduate school is a huge money making business. Young people go to college, and graduate or don’t graduate with huge amounts of debt. When you start out with debt in your early 20’s, you have to quickly find a way to pay it all back. This means you go to work. You become an employee in the work force, you make enough to pay your bills and maybe to live off of. You have to get loans to buy a car and a house... more debt. You have to keep working... You are locked in the system. 30 year mortgages, 5 year car payments... This is all by design. It keeps us in indentured servitude. But, it BEGAN in college. We started in debt. And, it’s interesting that college loans are unforgivable debts.

If we are ready to free ourselves and our families from the education system, then we should also consider why we may care so much if our children decide not to go to college. I’m not suggesting that the goal should be that our children are bums on the street, or people who aren’t “successful”. What I’m suggesting is that we redefine our measure of success. Is success the ability to get into debt and work for others, or is success the ability to be an entrepreneur and avoid getting into debt? Is the goal to be God-fearing and moral individuals, or people who measure themselves against the standards of this world? We must ask ourselves these questions.

If your goal is solely to give your kids a better education so that they can do well in college, I’m not hating on you. If my children decide to go to college, I want them to have the BEST foundation possible to thrive in an intense atmosphere. Plus, I want them to actually finish if they start!!! My goal for my children is that first and foremost, they grow into individuals who are pleasing to the Most High, and that they are able to be entrepreneurs and independent, well rounded thinkers. That when situations present themselves to my children, they will know how to take the ingredients around them, and make the best of it!! The goal for me is not to re-insert them into a system that is against us, but rather to operate in spite of it!! There is a subtle difference. But the difference is real.

T.E.A. 2018

Stranger Danger - Principals, Teachers, and School Bus Drivers

A common theme that I focus on when talking to parents about brick and mortar schooling (and daycare) is that when we drop our children off at school, or put them on the bus, we are entrusting their care, discipline, and education to strangers. Who are these people? How were they raised? What are their values? Who do they live with? Who are they sleeping with? What are their personal beliefs, biases, prejudices, etc? Do they smoke and drink?

Think about it. You put your child on a school bus with someone who, for all you know, could have a record. Some bus drivers in Pittsburgh listen to all kinds of music on their buses. Some are bus drivers as a second job, and barely get enough sleep the night before. Some are people you wouldn’t “normally” trust your children with - you wouldn’t allow them to babysit your children, however you will send off your kindergartener on their bus. You’ve never ridden around with them before to know how they drive, however your child rides on their bus without a seat belt on!

I read an article last night (read the story here) about a middle school social studies teacher who had a white supremist blog and podcast under a pseudo name. She said that she infused her beliefs into her teachings, and that she was even called on it by parents... She actually admitted to denying the claims and getting away with it! She also expressed her desire for MORE white supremacists getting into the schools!

Can we trust a person who hates people of color and thinks they are inferior to white people to teach our children? Can we trust a woman who hates men to teach our sons? Can we trust someone who doesn’t share our core values and religious beliefs to teach our children on a daily basis? Is a man an appropriate gym teacher for our adolescent daughters?

We must ask ourselves WHY we are so accepting of complete strangers being mentors to our children, when as parents we are perfectly capable of being there for our children! We are their best advocates! We are their best teachers! And yet, we feel like a certificate from college and a background check is all that is required to have an enormous amount of influence on our next generation!

We are accepting of these social norms because it is the status quo. In fact, homeschoolers get red flagged because we don’t have that extra layer of societal/governmental embedding in our families. 

As I read the news stories, I see the absolute absurdity in the assumption that degrees and background checks are the only prerequisites needed to being a trusted person with our children. We must do better. We must be more selective. It must be a priority to vet those who teach our children, and even those who drive our children around. It’s for their own safety and well being.

T.E.A. 2018

Authority, Permission, and Consent

While I was at the dentist office today, a mom complained about how her son was actually seen by a dentist at school, and came home to tell her that he actually even had a cavity filled. She was horrified!!! How and WHERE could a procedure like this be done at school, and without her permission?  WHO is this doctor - what is his or her credentials? Why did they feel it acceptable to actually go beyond the realm of checking his teeth to FIXING his teeth - when he has a dentist he sees twice a year?! She was upset that no one thought to call her and inform her that such a procedure was being performed on her child. She was angered that she somehow granted authority to the school and dentist to perform this procedure by signing a consent form that she didn’t understand.

We place an enormous amount of trust in the school system. We trust that they know what is best, and that they will teach our children what they need to know. We also trust that they can keep our children safe.

Think about it... we wait for the news to tell us if the school district cancelled school because of cold weather, or snow, or ice. We can look out our windows and make our own determinations on whether we SHOULD or SHOULD NOT send our kids out, or put them on school buses in such weather. When our children are sick, we have to send “excuses” with our children to justify keeping them home, and then the school determines if the absence is excused. We have to have a “good reason” for our children to miss school, or we can end up in truancy court. Do you see how we have given the schools so much authority that we as the parents have to ask for their PERMISSION to do what we think is right with our OWN KIDS!!!???!!!

Who has authority over our children? Why does it seem like we allow the school system to dictate to us how to raise our children, even in our own homes?! They have an enormous amount of authority in our world, if we give it to them!

Homeschooling is a way to change this dynamic. My husband and I have total authority over our children. When we take our children places, like the library or to sports activities, etc... others may have our permission or consent to have limited authority over them, but while we are present.

We have to learn how to break our dependency on strangers dictating what happens in our children’s lives.  And when we TAKE authority over our kids back, and teach them ourselves - it’s not about ASKING for permission to do so!

T.E.A. 2018